


Take Me Out

by happhapeo



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-17 21:40:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29478591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/happhapeo/pseuds/happhapeo
Summary: "Any last words?""Jeez, buy a guy dinner first."-or-Hitman Mark Lee takes Haechan out... (on a date)
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Comments: 2
Kudos: 44





	Take Me Out

"Pick up, pick up, pick up please.." Haechan muttered under his breath. 

"Yo, where are yo-" 

"YUTA PLEASE HELP ME SOMEONE IS TRYING TO MURDER ME," Haechan shrieked into his device, cutting Yuta off entirely. 

"Why are you yelling if you're trying not to be murdered!?" Yuta scolded just above a whisper. 

"Well... it's a bit complicated, but he's not actively trying to murder me for now. We're actually kinda on a date.." Haechan trailed off. 

"YOU'RE DOING WHAT NOW?" Yuta screamed. 

"Look, I don't have time to explain, but we're at Johnny's, so can you please come get me?" Haechan begged. 

"Okay-- wait, WHY DID YOU BRING A MURDERER TO JOHNNY'S HOUSE??" Yuta yelled even louder than before. 

"I'M NOT AN IDIOT YUTA I MEANT THE PIZZA PLACE," Haechan shouted back. 

"YOU'RE CLEARLY AN IDIOT CONSIDERING YOU'RE ON A DATE WITH SOMEONE WHO WANTS YOU DEA-" 

Haechan rapidly ended the call and shoved his phone deep into his pocket, then started scrubbing his hands in the sink as his date walked in. 

"Hey, you okay?" He asked. 

"Well, I've been better. I would've preferred if my last meal wasn't at a mediocre pizza place with the last person to see me breathing being my killer," Haechan rambled as he pulled paper towels from the dispenser. 

"Woah, hey, I'm not a killer," said the other as he put his hands up in defense. 

Haechan leaned up against the counter and faced him. "Look, I know you want to believe that you're a good person... whatever your name is, but just because you pay $17.99 for your victim's personal pan pizza doesn't make you a good guy." 

"Okay, I don't know what you're thinking, but I'm not gonna kill you. Also, my name's Mark," Mark lowered him hands and awkwardly pushed them into his hoodie pocket. 

"You pointed a gun in my face! What else was I supposed to think? That you were trying to sell me on some girl scout cookies?" Haechan said, exasperated.

"Look man, I was just doing my job. I was hired to kill you, but I'd never actually do it. I was just gonna knock you out," Mark admitted. 

"If you were never going to kill me, then why did you even break into my house in the first place?" Haechan questioned. 

"My boss found out that I wasn't doing my job because he saw one of my targets in a store. I told him that I couldn't do my job and that I was quitting. He said he'd only let me go if I killed one of my targets and gave him photo evidence," Mark sighed. 

"How were you gonna give him evidence if I wasn't dead?" Haechan asked. 

"I have a friend who's really good at photoshop," Mark smiled. 

... 

Haechan sat across Mark in the booth. He held his head in his hands as he began to process everything, while Mark happily ate his pizza. 

"I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I believe you," Haechan said after a long period of silence. 

"Really?! Oh my god, thank you man! I'm so glad I didn't knock you out now!" Mark's face lit up. 

"But seriously man, you really really need to work on your pitch. Don't let your boss walk all over you! You've gotta just walk up to him and be like 'I'm quitting, and you can't stop me,'" Haechan said, putting on his most defiant voice. 

"Yeah, you're right," Mark frowned. 

"So, do you actually know who hires the hitman, because I'd really like to kn-" 

"Oh my goodness! What are you doing here? You should be in the kitchen!" spoke the man who stood in front of their booth, with a clearly fake mustache. 

The man next to him piped up. "Yes, you should be in the kitchen! Do you want to lose your job... Mario?" 

Haechan stood up. "I hate to break it to you guys, but the crisis has been averted. This is Mark, turns out he's super nice, but he has a shitty boss. Also really Jungwoo? Do I look like a Mario to you?" 

Yuta threw his mustache on the table. "I'm done. I'm done! Why do I ever get involved? You should've just killed him Mark." 

"Yuta, wait up! Let's go get something to eat! You guys have fun on your date okay bye!!!" Jungwoo said before running after Yuta. 

Mark and Haechan watched him run out before turning back to their food. 

"Y'know, it's kinda funny," Mark said between bites. 

"What?" Haechan said with an eyebrow raised. 

"I knew I was going to take a person out today, but not like this," Mark giggled. 

Haechan paused from taking his next bite and looked up at Mark. 

"Shoot me. Kill me now please." He begged while Mark nearly choked from laughter.

**Author's Note:**

> This idea was super random but I kinda like how it turned out. 
> 
> Also, when Mark mentions his friend who can use photoshop, you can take that as Johnny OR Jaemin. Just thought it was fun to leave it up to imagination :]
> 
> Anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed reading it !


End file.
